Following are eight guidelines on how or how not to submit your wire for publication...

1. Never use the word "I" in your text unless you provide your name AND request your name be published with your wire.

2. Your wire should endeavor to provide the greatest amount of information regarding an issue of concern. For example, you should avoid submitting the followind:
   My supervisor is dishonest. He should be fired. I think he's a jerk.

   The above would be considered unacceptable for publication. Your wire should include as much of the following information as possible: name the supervisor or co-worker... (Who). Cite at least one specific act of possible dishonesty or impropriety he or she engaged in... (What). Say Where this occurred and Who was involved or present. When did this act occur. How and Why was it carried out. For example, your wire should read something like this:
   Last Monday on May 3 my supervisor, ASAC Joe Blow, left the building for a meeting with the local sheriff, John Dork. Joe told everyone in the office he could be paged if needed but he (deliberately?) left his pager on his desk. Another agent from the office, driving past the Happy Hills Golf Range to meet one of her CI's, phoned in to say she saw Joe's G-ride pull into the golf park with his secretary's (Scarlett O'Hara) smiling sister (Lois Lane) seated next to him. I phoned the sheriff's office to see if Sheriff Dork was at a meeting with ASAC Joe. The deputy I spoke to (Bruce Willis) said the sheriff was on vacation in Colombia. When ASAC Joe got back to the office he jumped all over an agent (Bill Buff) for misspelling Administrator Tandy's first name. Later, when ASAC Joe was in the head peeing Lois' DNA and VD evidence out of his pecker tube I glanced at his time sheet... it showed ASAC Joe being in the office all day shuffling paper from one side of his desk to the other. Something is wrong in Denmark. OPR should look into this... yesterday.

   Government employees conditioned on the two principles that "Information is King" and "He who knows the most gets the highest promotions" instinctively withhold important facts for personal use until and when personal gain from revealing all of the facts is more likely to benefit them personally. To those individuals who adhere (knowingly or unknowingly) to these principles, be advised that DEA Watch don't play that stuff. You must either write the whole truth and nothing but the truth, or publish your incomplete report elsewhere.

   Additionally... Do not modify actual events or statements. Use factual and complete detail. Should you include a detail or two DEA Watch feels might identify you as the author the editor will redact it, (D/W redacted). If you feel this redaction was an unnecessary protective measure by the editor simply inform him. Your original text will be restored if you request that your name and contact information be included for publication.

3. Do not address your wire to any person or writer. DEA Watch is not a chat room.

4. Never attack a writer if you disagree with the writer's position. Address your arguments to the writer's position, not to the writer.

5. Never attempt to dictate publication policy. For example, never attempt to tell agents what they should or should not publish.

6. Refrain from spell checking or grammar corrections. If you lack the intellect or ability to address the subject matter don't resort to playing school teacher.

7. If you wish to ignore any of the above and still have your wire published you must include the following statement at the bottom of your wire:

   "Please publish my name, title, office location, telephone number and email address as follows..."

8. If you find any of the above incompatible you should consider buying DEA Watch, which is for sale to the highest bidder. Make us an acceptable cash offer we can't refuse and we will sell you full ownership of DEA Watch. As the new owner you can publish anything you like, whenever you like. Go here to submit a bid to purchase DEA Watch: http://members.aol.com/deawatch/thewatch.htm.