S.P.A.M. -- Sane People Against Multitasking

S.P.A.M. - Sane People Against Multitasking

Our Motto: "Focus!"

S.P.A.M. believes:

Multitasking is bad for people.

My cousin’s brother-in-law was hit by a bus, my sister's boss was mugged, and my neighbor starved to death -- all while multitasking.
TMI -- Too Much Information! All at once, that is.The human brain can only process a limited amount of information within a given time frame. This is a fact. I learned it in college. Exceding the limit is called "information overload". It makes people ga-ga.
Am I invisible? People walking down the street, riding the bus -- whatever -- while multitasking don't notice the people around them. They could be potential lovers, best friends or muggers, but multitaskers won't notice. Actually, the muggers they'll notice. Just not in time.

Multitasking is bad for communication.

Ever seen newscasters multitasking? It makes them look stupid. It does the same thing to anyone trying to talk while multitasking.
Multitasking while instant messaging takes the instant out of it.
Driving while talking on the phone may be the ultimate in foolish multitasking. Not only can’t you fully concentrate on your driving, but the person at the other end only hears every other word. Give it up! Sing along with an Eagles CD instead.

Multitasking is bad for relationships.

Relationships require attention, and nobody can pay proper attention to anything or anybody while multitasking.
My doctor's husband walked out while she was multitasking and it took her two weeks to notice.
The neighbor kids tore down their whole back fence while their parents were multitasking. Their parents didn’t notice until one stopped multitasking long enough to see that three days of din-din was piled in the dog’s dish. The dog had moved in with neighbors in back, who never multitask. The dog refused to come home. The children were very sad.

Multitasking is bad for business.

My mechanic’s uncle’s restaurant franchise went under while his accountant was multitasking and paid the same bills twice.
The corner drugstore lost uncounted sums when its night clerk was multitasking and consistently gave too much change.
A gas station in the next county exploded when the attendant was multitasking and offered a light instead of a pen to a customer.

Multitasking is bad for America.

Undocumented aliens enter our country regularly while border guards are multitasking.
Elected representatives rarely make any sense during their speeches because their speech writers were multitasking on the job.
Terrorist hijackers attacked the US you-know-when while government officials were multitasking. One pretended to read a book about a goat – and held the book upside down, presumably because he was multitasking -- while silently asking God how to explain what was happening in NYC and Washington. Hence the vacant expression on his face.

Multitasking is bad for children.

My hairdresser’s best friend’s toddler wandered off while her babysitter was multitasking.
It took the police three hours to start looking for the toddler because the 911 operator was multitasking.
The toddler made it all the way across town because she was not multitasking.

Multitasking is bad for the environment.

People who are multitasking rarely notice when they litter accidentally.
The objects so commonly used for the purpose of multitasking tend to become obsolete rapidly and end up in the landfill.
Toxic emanations have been detected from bedrooms of teenagers and college students – notorious multitaskers – due to the backlog of dirty dishes and laundry that accumulates there. College dormitories are especially scary places for this very reason.

Multitasking is bad for puppies and kittens.

People who multitask rarely spay or neuter their pets in a timely fashion. Then they have puppies and kittens to spare, which usually means the puppies and kittens end up at the shelter, and you know what usually happens to them there.
Puppies and kittens need lots of TLC and training. Now tell me, how are you gonna train puppies and kittens while multitasking? You aren’t. That's why the pets of mutlitaskers have bad manners. (Their kids too, for that matter.)
Puppies and kittens never multitask, which is how they get into so much trouble while their owners are multitasking.

Multitasking is bad for everything and everybody, so just stop it right now!

This page was created while instant messaging with my daughter, doing laundry, and procrastinating about doing my taxes.
See? See how bad multitasking is? So stop it, stop it, stop it!!

But seriously, read these articles:

Multitasking Makes You Stupid: Studies Show Pitfalls of Doing Too Much at Once (Wall Street Journal)

Teens driven to distraction (Chicago Tribune)
Research shows why a teen brain capable of reasoning like an adult's is hijacked by emotions and impulses

Multitasking – Switching Costs (Psychology Matters)
Subtle “switching” costs cut efficiency, raise risk